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Welcome to Rantyville

A weekly show featuring TRB and Heather D, talking about everything and anything that pisses us off. Does it piss you off too? Listen in and find out!
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Aug 19, 2016

Heat and humidity have a very bad effect on the two brain cells that most customers have, and this week was no exception. With soaring temperatures and rising stupidity levels, retail hell takes on a new meaning. In this episode, TRB talks about a customer who left his mom to die in a hot car, why effort is maxed out when pay is, how useless "employee discounts" are, and much more retail fuckery.

The Couch Party app is the way! The way to catch nine of the best independent podcasts all in one place that is! Download it now from the Play Store for the best content and personalities, and I guarantee it will make your day stuck at a cash register a little more bearable.

So crack a cold one, drop by iTunes and leave TRB a 5-star review, and most importantly, be sure to wear someone else's nametag!

P.S. Next week's episode is a special one, so be sure not to miss it!

Aug 15, 2016

Feel like you should win gold for dodging that customer as you dash for your break? Ever thought that you earned a medal by enduring a marathon of insults from a client? Well if so, then this week's episode is for you! From the "Retail Olympics" and the desire to slap a customer, to the people that think we go to "school" just to work this job, TRB has got it all covered on this installment of The Retail Rant podcast.

Don't forget about the rest of the #CouchPartyCrew and download the Couch Party app for 9 of the best independent podcasts availanle! It's 100% free, so even a retail employee can afford it (admit it, we're all broke).

So kick back, grab a cold one, and most importantly, be sure you're wearing someone else's nametag!

Aug 12, 2016

Feel like you should win gold for dodging that customer as you dash for your break? Ever thought that you earned a medal by enduring a marathon of insults from a client? Well if so, then this week's episode is for you! From the "Retail Olympics" and the desire to slap a customer, to the people that think we go to "school" just to work this job, TRB has got it all covered on this installment of The Retail Rant podcast. 

Don't forget about the rest of the #Couch party crew,  and download the Couch Party app for 9 of the best independent podcasts available! It's 100% free, so even a retail employee can afford it (admit it, we're all broke).

So kick back, grab a cold one, and most importantly, be sure you're wearing someone else's nametag!

Aug 5, 2016

Do you already have Christmas products in your back room? Well I hate to tell you, the worst part of the "retail calendar" has begun. As if it's some portal into a deeper part of retail hell, it has opened its doors and is waiting to swallow our souls. But have no fear, TRB is here to fight back on this week's Retail Rant.

The pain in the ass known as conference calls, customers who love talking politics, and the co-workers that think the fridge is a buffet, it's all here in this show. So turn your phone down low, sit in that isolated corner of the break room, and don't mind the people staring as you enjoy a laugh at their expense! When you're done, leave a 5-star iTunes review, and be sure you're wearing someone else's nametag before you clock back in.

Support this show and the rest of the amazing #CouchPartyCrew by telling a friend about the Couch Party app for Android. The shows are great, the content is awesome, and it's all FREE!!!

Jul 29, 2016

Busted your ass all year long? Made sales plan by 10%? Signed up the most loyalty cards? Don't worry, corporate will give you a 1% raise, and TRB will tell you why to throw it back in their faces. Why do the idiots/lazy/ass kissers always get promoted? Because they fear people like us. All this and a discussion with @ODProbs2k16 about back to school, all in this week's episode of The Retail Rant!

Got some 5-star reviews laying around that you want to use? Throw them TRB's way on iTunes! Throw that love around, because we know we don;t have the money (we work retail).

Check out the best 9-pack of independent podcasts out there by downloading the Couch Party app! And check out the #CouchPartyCrew's new home - smartasspods.com

Jul 22, 2016

This week Ranty flies solo, and takes a swipe at the swipers. Not Tinder, not card readers, but Pokemon GO. People that think that a retail store is the place to be catching a Charizard or that the parking lot is the best place to be fixated to a phone screen, you should not be playing this game in a retail environment!!! There's also a message from long time fan Manager John (@managerjohn), who uncovers a new breed of LMA. And last but not least, TRB brings you "Fuck You Notes", a new interactive segment of the show.

Have a "Fuck You Note" from your retail job? Call the Ranty Hotline at (810) 373-9790 and leave your message to be played on the show!

Download the Couch Party app for Android, and get 9 of the best damn podcasts out there, all for FREE!!!

So enjoy this episode, kick back, leave The Retail Rant a 5-star iTunes review, and as always, be sure to wear someone else's nametag!

Jul 15, 2016

This week, we delve into the food and beverage industry with the host of the Effinbe Podcast, Steve Arce. He tells tales of customer service hell from over a decade in the business, and we discuss how to solve the problem of customer stupidity. We launch into the rant-osphere on topics like coupons, apps, and all kinds of general idiocy. So prepare yourself for lots of profanity, lots of fun, and a great show!

Be sure to support Steve by subscribing to his show on iTunes and leaving a 5-star review. Follow him on Twitter (@effinbepodcast) and catch up on the problems facing both sides of the counter.

Don't have the Couch Party app yet? Well get it for FREE on the Google Play Store already! Get access to 9 of the best independent podcasts available today. And drop some commentary over at smartasspods.com - the official home of the #CouchPartyCrew !

Jul 8, 2016

Joining TRB this week in her return to the show, it's Heather D (@IB4ECeptAfterC) to discuss why she is still drinking 2 days after 4th of July! Customers that make up their own post-holiday sales, TRB gets stuff thrown at him, and a absurd interaction that one of TRB's friends had this week. It's all in this week's episode!

You should not only download the Couch Party app, but you should also leave some 5-star love for the #CouchPartyCrew on iTunes! It's the easiest and best way to support the crew, and continue to help us in our plan for podcast domination!

So plug in those earbuds (the boss might not like what we have to say), find somewhere that customers can't find you (bathrooms aren't as safe as you may think), but most importantly, be sure to wear someone else's nametag!

Jul 1, 2016

Bookstores aren't for interviews! Or are they? TRB is joined this week by @MikeBookseller for some insight into what it's like working in a "big box" bookstore. From cafe interviews and homeless hangouts, to the manager getting beat up and that one overly religious person we've all worked with, you'll find it all in this episode!

Be sure to check out and support Mike's side projects, theSKU.org and krrobar.com. He brings the misery of retail hell straight to the funny pages 4 days a week, and he'll have you realizing that his artwork is your reality every day!

DOWNLOAD THE COUCH PARTY APP!!!!! It's totally free, and packed with 9 of the best damn podcasts that you'll find in one place, all for FREE!!! Subscribe, and be sure to drop some those 5-star review on 'em!

So let's kick back, relax, leave The Ranty Bastard a 5-star iTunes review, but most importantly, be sure to wear someone else's nametag!

Jun 24, 2016

This week's episode is a look into a sector of the "customer service" field that many of us may take for granted - the movie theater. TRB is joined by the host of the Digital Men - The Ultimate Rush and Prog Podcast, Ryan Howard (@howard_gregryan). From the underbelly of the concession stand, Ryan shows us that no matter what kind of industry you're in, customers will always find a way to be a douche.

Be sure to check out Digital Men - The Ultimate Rush and Prog Podcast on iTunes, and leave them a positive review (remember, 1 star anonymous reviews are for pussies, so don't do it!). And be sure to support the #CouchPartyCrew by downloading the Couch Party app for Android. You'll find 9 of the best damn shows out there for FREE, including this show, Couch Party, Miserable Retail Slave, Jake and Tom Conquer the World, The Nerd Rage Podcast, Project Archivist, The Grime Lords, The Mixed Feelings Podcast, and our newest addition to the crew, Let's Get Drunk and Talk Comics!

So kick back, shake off the working all "weekend" blues, drop a 5 star iTunes review for TRB, but most importantly, be sure to wear someone else's nametag!

Jun 17, 2016

This week TRB is joined again by Tara (@tara_atrandom) to talk about a ridiculous news story from the past week. There is no part of ANY retail job that says "Hey, take a beating in the parking lot after work", yet one of our fellow customer service workers had to endure just that. But not from one or two people, but three upstanding citizens from Sandusky, Ohio. So kick back and enjoy an "in-depth report" (insert sarcastic comment here) from The Ranty News Network. And when you're done, drop a five star review on iTunes (thanks to all of you who have)!

Be sure to check out Tara and Nash on live.radiodeadair.com every Monday night starting at 9pm for a look into life with cats, retro TV shows and music, and of course the What The Fuck Is Wrong With You segment!

This show is also available to you for FREE on the Couch Party app, the FREE home of this show and many great others. Download it now to hear the latest episodes of The Miserable Retail Slave, Couch Party, Jake and Tom Conquer the World, The Nerd Rage Podcast, Project Archivist, The Grimelords, and those two slanderous, scandalous women at The Mixed Feelings Podcast. Eight great shows for the price of NOTHING!!!!

Jun 10, 2016

VERY SPECIAL GUEST EPISODE!!! This week TRB is joined by the one, the only, Sean William Brown! The author of "Dear Customer" makes his return to talk about the awkwardness behind all those chip reader comments, how much role plays suck, and tell us about his newest endeavor, thesku.org! We also take a sneak peek into Sean's second book, "Wal-Mart, I Don't Belong Here", which will be covered in depth in a future episode.

So kick back, grab a copy of "Dear Customer" on Amazon/B&N (or wherever you buy your books), and be sure to wear someone else's nametag!

 

Jun 3, 2016

Join TRB and @fedupphonerep this week as we chat about what it's like dealing with the public and the one thing they can't live without - their cell phone. From ex-girlfriends trying to dig up old texts, to the idiot who thought YouTube was a reliable source to repair an iPhone, it's all here this week!

Be sure to support the Couch Party Crew by downloading the Couch Party app in the Google Play Store. In addition to this fine program, you will also get Miserable Retail Slave, Couch Party, The Nerd Rage Podcast, Drunken Dork, Project Archivist, The Mixed Feelings Podcast, and The Grimelords. It's all awesome, and it's all free!!!!

May 31, 2016

Well, it's officially been one year of The Retail Rant podcast, and what better way to celebrate than by revisiting the episode that started it all. From bad audio and no format at all, to lighting a cigarette on air every 2 minutes, this pile of shit turned in to the premier podcast for anyone who has ever experienced retail hell.  So strap on your headphones and take a trip down memory lane with TRB, but don't leave an iTunes review on this one!

And a big thanks to everyone who has interacted with the show over the past year, my fantastic guests, the Couch Party Crew (who for some reason added me to their app despite this episode), and every follower who likes and RTs my daily retail bullshit. Year number 2 is going to be great, and I look forward to continuing to bring you all a profanely entertaining look into retail hell.

May 27, 2016

This week's episode takes a look at the new overtime laws that go into effect later this year. TRB discusses how it could (and probably will) suck for a lot of managers, and how it will likely impact everyone in the retail world. But don't despair, even though it's a serious topic, it will be delivered in true Ranty Bastard fashion - lots of profanity and with a distinct hatred for HR! So kick back, leave a 5-star iTunes review, and most importantly, be sure to wear someone else's nametag!

Tell your friends to subscribe on iTunes or to download the Couch Party app, and spread the good word about how bad retail really is. And be sure to check out every offering from the Couch Party Crew!

 

May 20, 2016

The Retail Rant turns 50 this week! (Well, fifty weeks that is.) In usual ranty fashion, TRB serves up his take on the world known as retail hell. On this week's episode, the guys out there will learn what happens when you slip an underage girl your number, how TRB's soul has died from "kindness", and the best lies that customers have told retail employees when returning merchandise. A big thanks to everyone that sent in their comments on Twitter (@The_Retail_Rant)!

Be sure to support the Couch Party Crew by downloading the Couch Party app on Android. It's totally free, and packed full with eight of the best independent podcasts out there! And take a minute to check out out our new website, smartasspods.com! And vote #TRB2016 in the Couch Party primaries!

So kick back, leave a 5-star iTunes review (50 weeks and only 10 reviews? Come on!), and most importantly, be sure to wear someone else's nametag!

May 13, 2016

Joining TRB this week for his foray into retail hell, "gas station gal" (Twitter @thirdshiftchick) explains the rigors and stupidity that involve working the overnight shift. You'll also learn the three things that a customer should NEVER say to a retail employee. From late night drug dealers, to Canadians trying to buy gas in a "foreign" country, you'll find it all in this week's edition of The Retail Rant podcast!

And not only can you find the show on iTunes and the Couch Party app, but visit the new #CouchPartyCrew website, smartasspods.com! Leave a note for the crew and vote for your Couch Party Presidential nominee (hint, it's TRB).

Enjoy, but as always, be sure to wear someone else's nametag!

May 6, 2016

It's been one hell of a day, and you've been ready to leave for the last 2 hours. You finally lock the doors, escort the LMAs out, and breath a sigh of relief. But then it hits you. The store is wrecked. You sigh harder. Well, it's that second, prolonged sigh that brings you this week's edition of The Retail Rant podcast. See why TRB hates closing, and all the little surprises that rear their heads after locking up. So kick back, leave a 5 star iTunes review, and as always, wear someone else's nametag.

And be sure to check out the new home of the #CouchPartyCrew at smartasspods.com. Leave a comment, show some love, and support TRB in the Couch Party Elections!  #TRB2016 for President!!!

Apr 29, 2016

TRB is joined this week by another good friend of the show, Tara (@tara_atrandom), to talk about the similarities within the retail world. You will learn that customers can be a pain in the ass, especially in one particular retail setting. We also chat about our disdain for the American shopping mall, as well as how work can make you hate a celebrity. And you'll see why not everyone in the Couch Party Crew should run for president (hint - they're all running).

A big thank you to everyone who took time out to show support for our friend Seattle Amanda (@mandasaures_rex). It is greatly appreciated by Amanda as well as TRB!

Download the Couch Party app and get all seven podcasts from the Couch Party Crew! You'll get great programs like Miserable Retail Slave, The Drunken Dork, Couch Party (duh!), The Nerd Rage Podcast, and our newest additions; The Grime Lords and the Mixed Feelings Podcast! So get to the Google Play Store and get it NOW!

Apr 22, 2016

Peel back the onion this week, and let the tears flow as TRB discusses the most outdated and irritating method of payment - the check. From their many negatives to the few positives, and a lot of scams in between, listen in while The Ranty Bastard pours out his disdain for checkbooks in retail.

Also, please support our good friend of the show, Seattle Amanda (@mandasaures_rex), as she goes through a very rough time and some bad health issues. Be it a message to help her through the day, or a donation to her razoo.com fundraiser (Healthy is a Goal - Amanda Rhoades), please show our friend some love. Because once you've experienced retail hell, we are ALL family.

Apr 15, 2016

In this week's episode, join TRB as he rants about the use and abuse of the retail parking lot. From people who simply cannot park, to the beggar's badlands, this show will highlight the foul treatment that customers and vagrants unleash on our parking lots every day.

Be sure to download the Couch Party app (Android users) for 7 of the best damn pods out there. There's a different show for every day of the week, so why wouldn't you?! And if you're an iTunes user, be sure to leave TRB and the entire Couch Party crew a 5-star review!

Apr 1, 2016

Beware! Temperatures are starting to rise, and the sweat money has already made it's return! Join TRB on this week's foray into the world of retail hell as he discusses funky (as in sweaty, not George Clinton) customers, the neverending fight with mail-in rebates, and what cost cutting does to retail morale. Brought to you in allergy-HD audio, this episode is the perfect way to kick off the "spring selling season"!

Be sure to leave a lovely 5-star iTunes review, and be sure you're wearing somebody else's nametag at all times!

Mar 25, 2016

This week's episode of The Retail Rant is brought to you by yet another "interesting" week in the retail life of TRB. Warmer weather means that the idiots are starting to come out of their winter cocoons. From the "well, it's under warranty" people to bosses that turn emails into a half marathon, it's all on this episode.

Subscribe on iTunes, or download the Couch Party app to make sure you never miss the destruction of everything we ALL hate about retail!

 

Mar 18, 2016

How many times have you wished you had a superpower while at work? Admit it, we all have. Whether it was invisibility or mind reading, we have all thought about it. In that spirit, TRB welcomes HAB (@Couch_Party) and Rnady aka "King Dork" (@MRetailSlave) to the show this week to discuss which comic book ability we would want if we were stuck in retail hell forever. It's some good old fashioned fun as we goof off and just have fun discussing retail past and present. Also, an exclusive announcement from Randy regarding the future of The Miserable Retail Slave podcast!

And seriously, if you enjoy the show, leave TRB a 5-star review on iTunes! I've been stuck at 7 reviews for the last 6 months, so show some love for your retail hating friend.

Most importantly, be sure you're wearing someone else's nametag!

Twitter @The_Retail_Rant

 

Mar 11, 2016

We've all seen it lately, the people that voice their opinion about "customer service" on a receipt. Well these crafty little wordsmiths have found their way on to TRB's radar this week. These Shakespeare wannabes that leave their little nuggets of "advice" on the tab have to be stopped! And TRB will tell you how! It's been too long since the restaurant "customer service" industry was a topic here on the Rant, so this episode is for every server, waiter/waitress, and bartender that has had to count how many letters their tips had instead of dollars.

Also, be sure to catch TRB's big announcement that will change the face of retail! So plug in your headphones, crack a beer or 12, and get ready for this week's Retail Rant!

Don't forget to leave an iTunes review if you're checking out the show on an iOS device, and rate the Couch Party app if you're listening on Android!

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