Welcome to Rantyville

A weekly show featuring TRB and Heather D, talking about everything and anything that pisses us off. Does it piss you off too? Listen in and find out!
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Jan 8, 2016

Well, winter is here, and we can't do anything about it. But while you're nestled up in your blanket with your NyQuil, check out this week's episode of The Retail Rant podcast. TRB discusses why winter sucks, sickness in the workplace, and a few other choice topics, all while using the "f-word" (not "free") a lot. So bundle up, pop in your earbuds, and enjoy this week's show!

No earbuds you say? Well then you need to get to quick friend! Check out their huge selection of quality earbuds, as well as durable and custom iPhone and Galaxy cases. The geeks have it all in one site for all your needs! And not only do they have 100% FREE shipping, but you can save 13% off your order with the promo code "party5". That's right, free shipping PLUS 13% off your order!

A big thanks to Mrs. Tom Coe for our promo spot this week, and as always, enjoy, leave a review, and destroy if necessary!

Jan 1, 2016

New year, new show, the same old Ranty Bastard!

The rant is on in 2016!! As the first show of the year, you know TRB is going to discuss all the fuckery associated with New Year's in retail! From early closings and drunken customers, to callouts and the bad excuses, this week's Retail Rant has it all. So once you've set all your Valentine's Day planograms, sit back and enjoy this episode!

Also, don't forget to support our sponsor, The Geeks have it all in one place your phone, tablet, and tech accessory needs. They always have free shipping, and you can still save 13% off your total order with promo code "party5". So check out their site, pick up some goodies for yourself, and support the show, by shopping

ANNOUNCEMENT!!! For all you Android users out there, The Retail Rant podcast is now on the Couch Party app! You can get every episode of this show, as well as The Miserable Retail Slave, Couch Party, The NerdRage Podcast, The Drunken Dork, and now Project Archivist. So go download the app now and listen to them all (plus you never know when TRB may make a guest appearance)!

Dec 31, 2015

Just a quick message to all the fans, supporters, followers, and subscribers. YOU have made 2015 a GREAT year for The Ranty Bastard, and I wish the best for every one of you in 2016. So be safe out there tonight, and enjoy a new episode of The Retail Rant coming soon.

Dec 24, 2015

Well, it's not all ranty this week. TRB does trash some customers, but a soft spot was hit this week that waranted discussion. A shorter show than usual, but you should be enjoying your Christmas (aka a day off from retail), and time with family and friends. So don't worry about TRB going soft; the hardcore ranting is back on and in full effect next week!

And be sure to visit our sponsor at to pick up all the things you need to go along with your new, shiny Christmas toys! On top of their year-round FREE shipping, use promo code "party5" at checkout for an additional 13% OFF!!! From high quality, custom iPhone and Galaxy cases, to earbuds and tablet accessories, the geeks at have got you covered!

Dec 22, 2015

As the final "flashback" (yeah, I know, all the way back to July) of 2015, join TRB in a thorough thrashing of two groups of people we all hate - early morning and last minute assholes. It's especially ranty, and it's a topic we ALL encounter daily. It's a particularly relevant episode, as we deal with the worst LMAs of the year, the last minute Christmas shopper!

Don't forget to visit our sponsor,, for all of your iPhone and Galaxy needs, as well as anything else you need for your new shiny Christmas gifts. Because let's face it, those factory earbuds just aren't gonna cut it. Maybe you got a new tablet and need a case. Or a stand so you don't drop it on your face in bed. Whatever you need, tyhe geeks at have you covered! They always have FREE shipping, and you can save an additional 13% off when you use promo code "party5" at checkout!


Dec 18, 2015

That phrase is annoying any time of year, but people screaming for price checks during the "holiday season" can just be downright infuriating. Join TRB this week and revel in our mutual disdain for price checks and people that want 50 $5 gift cards during a rush. And if you have a terrible manager, have them sit down and take notes for the last part. You'll be glad you did.

And for all you LMAs, visit to finish up all of your Christmas shopping. From custom iPhone and Galaxy cases, earbuds, screen protectors and more, the geeks have your last minute ass covered! Shipping is always FREE, and you will save an additional 13% off your order when you use promo code "party5" at checkout. Don't get trampled by the masses at the mall, when you can shop from home with!

Enjoy, leave a review, destroy if necessary, and don't forget to wear somebody else's nametag!

Dec 17, 2015

Not all of you have been with TRB since the beginning, but you shouldn't be left out! This is one of the first episodes of The Retail Rant, and the first to be re-released as part of the best of 2015, Ranty style. Enjoy this one as I discuss customer loyalty and coupons at great length and with distinct disgust. And forgive the audio issues - I was only 4 weeks in to podcasting and still learning a lot to bring you the shows I do today. But enjoy in anyways, because it's retail hatred at it's finest (except for the audio).

Also, no promo spot on the show itself, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't go to to finish off your Christmas list! Get those last minute gifts or stocking stuffers, and use promo code "party5" at checkout to get 13% off of your order. And always has FREE shipping!

Dec 10, 2015

An early release for this week's show so that I could get some plugs out.

Be sure to go and support our friend of the show, Tom E Thompson, as he and fellow comics Andy Benigno, Chris Young and Tim Steele bring the comedy to The Riverfront Grille in Chesaning, MI this Saturday. Get to the show, bring a toy for the Toys for Tots drive, and be sure to tell Tommy that TRB sent ya!

Now with that done, check out the rest of the show as TRB addresses customer behavior during the "holidays", as well as my creative insight into the retail hell we are all trapped in.

And be sure to visit our sponsor, Free shipping, great last minute Christmas gifts from the comfort of your iPad, and 13% off your order with the promo code "party5". Convenient shopping without the crowds or Christmas music!

And as always, enjoy, leave an iTunes review, and destroy if necessary!

Twitter @The_Retail_Rant

Dec 4, 2015

*Disclaimer - You should do your best The Rock impression when you read this.

Finally, The Mrs. Ranty Bastard, has AGREED, to do The Retail Rant Podcast.

Join the family this week as we discuss a retail household with kids, and catch up on Mrs. TRB's take on some new days of the week.

As always, enjoy, leave a review, and destroy if necessary!

Nov 27, 2015

Join TRB and The Muse this week as we thrash a “motivational speaker” who likes belittling retail employees.
And if this show isn’t enough for your ranting fix, check out the Thanksgiving episode of The Couch Party and “Blowdog” by our friends over at The Miserable Rejection, i mean Retail, Slave!

Nov 26, 2015

I just wanted to take a moment today, and wish a very happy Thanksgiving (NOT BLACK THURSDAY) to all of you.
Please enjoy the time you have today with family and friends, no matter how short it may be, and give thanks for all that
you have in your life. HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

With love (and condolences for those that have to work)

The Ranty Bastard
P.S. There will still be a regular show Friday!

Nov 20, 2015

Get prepared my retail brethren! We are one week away from Fucktard Friday!
TRB steers away from the dreaded “busiest day in retail” this week, but still takes time to address more stupid topics, like those customers that love regurgitating their daily dose of CNN.
Also on this episode, a breakdown of the corporate “contests”, and I attempt to rationalize projected sales vs. payroll!
All while broadcasting from the depths of retail hell! (So excuse the background noise).
Enjoy, leave a review, and destroy if necessary!

Nov 13, 2015

If you have chronic headaches from computer beeps and stupid questions, then your good friend The Ranty Bastard offers up this week’s show as the cure!
A little more Black Thursday/Friday in this episode, plus what really pisses TRB off about the whole Starbucks red cups pseudo-controversy.
Lots of shout-outs to listeners and fans, a fair amount of profanity laced retail perspective, all presented to you on the 25th episode!
And as always, enjoy, leave a review, and destroy if necessary!

Nov 6, 2015

Yes my retail brethren, it is time to start discussing our most hated time of year - the dreaded “Black Friday”.
From shopping stampedes and ridiculous hours, to campers and non-parking idiots, it’s all in this week’s episode
of The Retail Rant podcast.
Subscribe on iTunes for all you Apple people.
Subscribe on the Satchel player app if Android is your thing.
But either way, enjoy, leave a review, and destroy if necessary!

Oct 30, 2015

People on the phone can be the worst! If you agree, you’ll love this episode of The Retail Rant!

Join TRB (The Ranty Bastard) as he discusses this and getting past the Halloween “preseason” of the holidays.

Enjoy, leave a review, destroy if necessary!

And be sure to follow on Twitter @The_Retail_Rant!

Oct 23, 2015

With the holidays right around the corner, it’s time for the corporate directive to execute order 66 (which really means hire anyone with a heartbeat).

A shorter show this week where your friend in retail hell, The Ranty Bastard, will discuss and dissect the few advantages and many disadvantages of hiring “holiday help”. And if you just can’t get enough of TRB, check out my guest spot on Couch Party this week.

Enjoy both shows this week, and as always, leave a review and destroy if necessary!

Oct 16, 2015

This week The Retail Rant turns 21!

Listen as your friend, The Ranty Bastard, discusses professional thieves that help themselves to our

products and manage to turn it into rent money! Also a brief discourse about those customers that

always want to touch us (vomits in mouth a little).

So take delight in the beer burps, the shameless promotion of a new favorite beer, and the profanity associated

with being a retail slave.

A big thanks to both the Couch Party and Drunken Dork guys for their “inspiration” this week.

And as always, enjoy, leave that 5 star review, and destroy if necessary!

Oct 9, 2015

Enjoy this week’s show with Randy (@mretailslave) from the Miserable Retail Slave Show!

We riff and discuss our trials and tribulations from our time in retail hell.

Check out his show after this one, and continue to support The Legend and The Ranty Bastard!

Enjoy, leave a revoew (for his show too), and destroy if necessary!

Oct 2, 2015

The dreaded “chip card” kicks off this week - and it is due to become yet another pain in our collective ass.

This issue and others on this week’s episode of The Retail Rant!

As always, enjoy, leave a (legit) review on iTunes, and destroy if necessary!

Sep 25, 2015

Tired of the Republican debates? The Ranty Bastard is!

I promised this topic revisited to many of you, so here you go!

Thanks to @worstBKever for taking time this week to discuss the proposed $15 an hour minimum wage for fast food workers.

As always, enjoy, leave a review on iTunes, and destroy if necessary.

Sep 18, 2015

Sell more - the CEO needs a first class flight!

And by the way, cut payroll by 20% but we need an extra $5000 in sales!

This and more fine corporate logic on this week’s episode of The Retail Rant.

Enjoy, leave an iTunes review, and destroy if necessary.

Sep 11, 2015

Ever wanted to choke out that lazy co-worker?

You just might do it after listening to this week’s episode!

(I say don’t do it, but if you must…..)

Enjoy, leave a review on iTunes, and destroy as necessary!


Sep 3, 2015

Planograms, the death of the retail employee.

Followed in a close second by customers who think they are a “celebrity”.

Shorter episode this week so please forgive and listen.

But regardless, enjoy, leave a review on iTunes, and destroy if necessary!


Aug 28, 2015

On this week’s episode of The Retail Rant Podcast, I welcome the author of “Dear Customer: Inside the World of Baristas, Upselling, and the Rules of Serving a Special Cup of Coffee”, Mr. Sean William Brown. We discuss his book, our mutual despise of customers, and talk about “customer service” in general. Also, we get the dish on his upcoming book, “Wal-Mart: I Don’t Belong Here”.

If you’re not following him on Twitter (@SWilliamBrown33) or checking out his blog ( after this show, then there may be no hope for you. Unless you buy the book. Then you will be absolved. I mean come on, it’s only $4 in ebook or $10 in paperback. I know, we’re all broke ass retail workers, but it’s worth every penny!

As always, enjoy, leave an review on iTunes, and destroy if necessary.



Aug 21, 2015

Abused by a customer?

Want to strike back?

Flirty co-workers?

We have it all this week on The Retail Rant!

Enjoy, leave a review on iTunes, and destroy if necessary!

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